Lose Everything
by Dream HUGE
Summary: The simulation was meant to break them, but if it was simply reality for Robin, how can he break? The team learns a little about their little birdie, oneshot.


**Lose Everything**

The Boy Wonder sat quietly at the couch, wrist computer pulled up and clicking away. The rest of the team scattered around the room; Artemis on the ground, polishing her arrows and inspecting her bow, Kaldur talking softly with M'gann, discussing the odd novelties of the world, Conner watching the tv which channel kept changing because of Wally's fast moving thumb on the remote.

"Would you just pick something?" the clone growled out, glaring daggers at the speedster, who looked up in surprise with an impish grin.

"Patience Supey, if you have some we might just get a really awesome movie instead of some crummy show," Wally said as excuse for his channel changing, this earned him a snort from the ebony haired bird, who didn't even glance up from his wrist computer.

Glancing up again, Wally noticed Superboy's glare deepen, and quickly settled on a channel. A horror movie in fact, although the fake blood appeared pretty realistic for once.

The clone settled into his seat, satisfied that the teen had finally settled on a channel, but soon had his glare and frown back in place at the archer of the group's protest.

"We can't watch this," she said glancing around, only receiving confused faces, "Its rated R and Robin's what? Twelve?"

The team's eyes centered on the young acrobat in question, who remained as emotionless as ever, not even bothering to look up from his computer. Although, what the group of teens didn't know, was the boy's anger, building up slowly under the surface.

Although Wally looked at him strangely, finding it odd his snarky best friend didn't fix the archer's age mess up, knowing that would usually coax a sarcastic retort from the Boy Wonder's mouth.

"It's not like he's actually watching it," Conner grouched, just wanting to settle back into watching something, anything really.

"I do not know, my friend, Robin is rather young," the Atlantian reasoned, looking over at the little bird in question.

"Come on, you guys are so dumb," Wally shot out, earning a few glares, "As much as I like making fun of Rob's age as the next person. It's not like any of us have never seen this stuff before, we are superhero's for crying out loud, and plus Robbie boy lives in Gotham."

Unnoticed by the team, Robin's jaw and fists clinched slightly at the mention of his age. His eyes narrowed into a full out Batglare on his computer, still refusing to look at any of his teammates. He continued to type away though, not missing a step and never faulting.

After a few more convincing words, the team decided it would be fine to watch the movie with Robin in the room. The teen acrobat pretended not to care, though he was seething underneath, and continued to boil to a low simmer until Black Canary called them in for training.

Training it seemed, but not their usual hand to hand combat.

"We will mentally test each of you," the hero said, hand cocked on her hip as she examined each of them, before stepping aside and letting a Martian Manhuntter take center stage.

"You shall each individually go forward before me," the green alien said, looking each teen hero in the eye, expect for Robin who he simply looked in the mask, "This is to test how you will mentally do in a situation, unlike most of the mental simulations that will usually happen individually, in this simulation the same thing will happen to each of you."

The Martian nodded his head, "Will anyone want to go first?"

Kaldur walked forward when none of the other vigilante's offered to go first, the green hero put his hand on the teen boy's shoulder and looked at the rest of the group in front of him, "The rest of you shall observe each of your teammates."

The green hero directed the Atlantian to a chair in the center of the glowing floor. Gingerly, the teen sat in the chair, and with a smile, J'onn sat in a chair across from him.

The team watched as Martian Manhunter's eyes glowed, shining light and as Kaldur's eyes slowly lost focus. After a few minutes the seated Atlantian let out a strangled sound, gaining the attention of his teammates. His hands clutched the arms of his chair and his eyes saw unseen things in the distance, tears trickling down his face. The teen let out a few other pleas and cried before finally dropping his head in his lap, his body racking with sobs.

J'onn slowly blinked his eyes, allowing them to lose their illumination. And the team leader's eyes regained focus and he was brought back into reality. The teen looked the hero in the eye, the Atlantian's gray eyes full of sorrow.

The team watched as the Atlantian slowly got to his feet and walked almost shakily toward them, although there was a smile of encouragement on his face. No one felt encouraged.

There was a silent standoff amongst the team until Artemis let out an exasperated sign and marched forward to sit on the chair in front of the Martian Manhunter.

The archer's session went much the same as the Atlantian's although she sobbed earlier and her voice screeched out much higher than the team leader's, but when it was all said and done she had the same look of sorrow in her eyes.

After the archer shakily stood from the chair and went to receive an embrace from M'gann, Conner went forward, slightly oblivious to the reason everyone seemed to be avoiding the training session.

The clone had a slightly different reaction than from the two before him, instead of sobbing at first, he screamed in rage, making almost all the teens jump or wince in surprise. He roared out, wildly looking around himself, but soon his rage turned into agony, just like everyone else. He ended in silent sobs, although the edge of anger was still prominent.

When he was realized from the Martian's mental hold, he stood up, legs not shaky, but determined, not even realizing what he was doing. He looked around for a few moments, getting his bearings, before stalking over to stay with the rest of the team.

Miss Martian timidly went next, smiling at her uncle as she sat down. Her experience had many more shrill screams and cried of pain and sorrow than Artemis' session. She folded in on herself in the chair, sobbing and crying only a few minutes into the simulation. Her uncle seemed to notice her state and quickly ended the session, much sooner than the other's although M'gann didn't seem to mind or notice. The teary eyed Martian hugged her uncle tightly, before getting up to join her team once more.

Wally sped forward next, quickly taking a seat. His sobs were slightly louder than Kaldur or Artemis' but nowhere as loud as M'gann's. He doubled over, much the same as his teammates, although his hands clutched the arms of the chair.

Finally after a few more minutes, the teen was released back into reality. He looked around him, eyes wet with tears, after a few moments he got to his feet, albeit pretty shaky, he stumbled to his team, looking each of them in the eye.

The small group's eyes turned toward the youngest of them. Robin in return stalked forward, about to take a seat in the chair when a gentle hand stopped him.

"Robin-" Black Canary began, looking at the small teen in front of her, eyes only convaying the love and care she held for him.

"I can handle it," the Boy Wonder growled out, looking her dead in the eye, and the hero could feel it.

"I don't think you know-"

"I know _exactly _what's going to happen," the teen acrobat spat at, his team looking at him in worry, although they didn't hear what he growled out to Canary, "And it nothing that hasn't happened to me before," and with that he sat down in the chair looking right into J'onn's eyes, a look of determination on his young masked face.

The green alien's eyes glowed once more and the team watched as the Boy Wonder didn't move a muscle. They were unable to see his eyes unfocus and refocus around him on the fake reality.

The Boy Wonder looked around him to see war raging. He watched as what appeared to be robots destroyed every living being in sight. He looked around him and saw that he was tied down without his costume, making him effectively useless as he couldn't reach his means of freedom.

He watched as he recognized a red and yellow blur wiz past him only to be stopped cold by a robot and quickly crushed in the ground, but the tied vigilante didn't have time to focus on his best friend's limp form, as a black shadow appeared around him. Looking back, he saw none other than his mentor, who stalked forward past Robin and jumped into the fray of things.

Robin however, did have time to watch as Robots slowly took the feared Dark Knight down. He watched as blood trickled and then gushed from the bullet proof costume. He watched the blood drip to the floor and he was soon wrenched back, remembering when he had seen that much blood before.

_The crack echoed throughout the tent, and a small Dick Grayson couldn't tear his eyes from the scene below him, the murder that he had just witnessed. He didn't feel anything as he slit down the ladder from his platform as the top of the colorful tent. He didn't feel anything when he stumbled toward the broken forms of his parents. He didn't feel anything when his knees gave way, landing him in a puddle of sticky red substance. He didn't feel anything for a while after that. _

_He didn't feel as someone pulled him away. He didn't hear the cops, the crowd, the shouts. He just looked below him at his parent's lifeless forms. He didn't feel the single trickle of hot liquid from his eyes, rolling down his cheek. He didn't feel anything for a long time, until he started to feel the rage. _

The team watched from the outside, not knowing what was happening as Robin had no physical reaction to what J'onn was showing him. The teens exchanged looks, knowing what the little bird was seeing. Although they noticed in surprise when J'onn jerked back. And they saw the Martian's hands clutch onto the arm rests' of his chair.

Black Canary took notice and glanced between the stoic seated teen and the flustered looking hero before coming forward to rest a hand on the green hero's shoulder. After a few moments, J'onn blinked his eyes and took in a deep breath, his eyes looking with what might have been seen as fear as well as sorrow at the young teen before him.

Robin's body was still tensed in his seat, back straight up and his eyes sparkled with unshed tears hidden by his domino mask to those around him. Black Canary, trying to brush past this little hitch, though she wanted to ask the martian what happened, although she already thought she just might know, put her hand on her hip and looked the rest of the team in the eyes, and mask when Robin got up to join them.

"Now I want all of you to go and discuss what you just saw," and with that she dismissed them.

-BREAKLINE—

***Kind of midway through the conversation* **

The Boy Wonder sat silently, watching all those around him. He hadn't uttered a word since sitting down in the chair. The group was gathered around in the living room, Artemis had her arm around M'gann and the rest of the team just had sorrow filled faces.

"I just can't even imagine that happening, I mean I guess it can, but for it to actually happen, to just lose everyone and everything," the rage within the young acrobat boiled, he was furious, but his team wouldn't understand. They wouldn't understand what if feels like, to lose everything like that to, it was a silly simulation for them. Just a simulation, not reality. Never reality.

Kadlur spoke up next, looking at his silent teammate, "What do you think, Robin?"

"Ya it would suck," he growled out through gritted teeth, not trusting himself to say much more for fear of blowing up and losing it.

But someone beat him to blowing up, "WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM?! DID YOU NOT SEE WHAT THE REST OF US SAW!? DID YOU NOT LOSE EVERYTHING?" Artemis screamed at him, having enough of the silent bird and his lackluster comment just triggering it.

"I saw it," the Boy Wonder said calmly, her anger allowing him to calm himself.

"And that all you have to say! IT WOULD SUCK!? What kind of coldhearted person are you!? Are you just from hell itself?!" Artemis shot back, her anger only building, but her last sentence triggered something and before she knew what was happening, the Boy Wonder had flipped across the room to loom over her, anger clear on his masked face.

"Robin!" Kaldur loudly rebuked, not liking the anger that came of the teen acrobat in waves, at the Atlantian's shout, Robin turned so that he was facing everyone although his eyes found Artemis, this she could feel deep in her bones.

"Don't talk to me about hell," the boy growled out, "I've been living there for the past four and a half years. Don't talk to me about the stupid simulation. That was nothing. NOTHING compared to how it feels in reality."

The teen had the whole teams attention as he spoke, but he swiftly turned, readying to leave, but was stopped by a gentle hand to his arm. Looking back, black and white mask met emerald green eyes, the eyes of Wally West. The speedster didn't have to speak to convey his message, and after a few moments to the young vigilante turned back and took his seat once more, although his face didn't show if he was happy to be there or not.

"Please talk to us, Robin," M'gann asked, tears in her eyes as she spoke.

"Batman wouldn't approve," the boy started, glaring at Wally when he opened his mouth to protest, "But Batman can go screw himself," which of course earned him a few smiles, although that wasn't what the teen vigilante was trying for.

Looking in front of him at the blank TV, he began his tale, or at least an edited version of it.

"I was nine," he whispered softly, "When I first experienced that stimulation, but it wasn't a simulation, you see. It was reality," that seemed to hit the team like a ton of bricks, but the boy trudged on with story, "I watched my parents' murder, it was from a fall, I can still see it. My mother's glowing face, reaching toward me, a smile brighter than the sun itself. I watched her coming toward me, but I saw it coming, I noticed, screamed at her, but it was too late, far too late. So I watched as my mother's face lost its sunshine and I saw the look of horror on her face and she and my father plummeted toward the ground. I can still hear the crack of bones, over and over."

"Robin, I'm-" Artemis began quietly, looking at the Boy Wonder.

"I couldn't feel anything for a while after that," he continued, plowing right through Artemis, "I-I was adopted, so I guess that was a plus, but it was hell none the less. At first I didn't know if I could go on, but I did, maybe it was because of the rage. The rage that powered me to become who I am today, but I don't know. Maybe it was from the sorrow, of having everything taken from you. Maybe it was from the regret. But it could have been from the loneliness. The words 'I love you' haven't been spoken to me in four and a half years. I don't know if I can feel anymore…," and more quietly he added, "I was once told by a villain in Gotham that I was much colder than my mentor, I-I think he was right, how am I to be warm when I'm just empty, when what I can rarely feel is a cold rage."

"Oh Robin!" M'gann exclaimed floating over to the Boy Wonder and hugging him, completely surprising him, "I'm so sorry Robin," and the young acrobat could feel the wetness of tears from the sobbing martian. Sobbing over him. And then he heard it, leaving multiple mouths, from almost all his teammates, some to tear filled to speak, "I love you, we love you, Robin," repeated over and over again quietly.

And the Boy Wonder could feel the tears coming from his eyes, for once in four and half years, tears of joy and happiness and disbelief. And the team understood that age was just a number, that when applied to them it meant next to nothing.

**So basically I wrote this because I had a lot of feels. At first I wasn't going to end it so happy and lovey dovey but I did anyway. But anyway I just can't get over it, its like my world is crashing down around me, and I know I'm late on posting this for my reasoning, but I just hit me and it hit me way too hard… way too hard. **

**So first YJ has to be offed, come on, but I've been coming to except that, but then they go kill Damian, just no NONONONO! Like for reals, I'm close to tears just thinking about it, and then the reboot, oh my gosh nonononononno, and then I had to go and read a one shot about Damian and Dick and Damian being all sad and depressed bc Dick didn't know who he was and my heart just exploded at that and I had to write this out of anger and sorrow, so sorry if Robin seems overly angry or moody and out of character, and sorry if I make Batman sound like poo, but he was just the receiving end of my rage, *sorry Bats!* **


End file.
